


You & I

by primroseprint



Category: Until Dawn (Video Game)
Genre: AU where the sisters died in a car accident and not on the mountain, Adult Content, F/M, Implied/Referenced Rape/Non-con, Mental Health Issues
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2016-09-01
Updated: 2016-09-06
Packaged: 2018-08-12 07:35:32
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 4
Words: 3,123
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/7926139
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/primroseprint/pseuds/primroseprint
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>You and Josh are stuck in between best friends and that one annoying couple. Neither of you know what you want, as you have your own demons to deal with.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. 8/31/14

He smiled brightly up at you as he laid his head in your lap.

                                            

“This is the best part of the whole movie, the big killer reveal.”

 

“Josh this movie is fucking stupid.” You responded crassly. Scream, Wes Craven’s horror comedy masterpiece, as Josh called it. You thought it was more of a _trash_ terpiece. Ha.

 

Looking down at the time on your phone, you realized it was well past nine at night. “Josh did you take your meds?”

 

He tugged on your hand and pointed at the screen, trying to distract you from the issue at hand. “ _Josh?_ ”

 

He groaned. “I will, ugh.” He sat up wrapping his arms around you. “What are you, my mother?”

 

“Since your mother is out, I will act as a stand in.” You paused the movie. “Now, take your meds Josh.”

 

“It would be awful weird if you were my mom, considering how many times I’ve stuck my dick in you.”

 

You froze, feeling heat rush to your cheeks. Damn, that boy. It was odd, your relationship. Not quite just friends, but not quite dating. It was somewhere between friends that fuck and a hardcore ‘I love you’ couple. Josh told you frequently that he loved you, but only when he was trippy with mood swings from his meds. It wasn’t clear whether he meant it or not. Other times, he’d grab you by the waist and push you against the nearest wall and fuck you until you couldn’t walk straight. It was an odd medium, but a happy one nonetheless.

 

He laughed, knowing he had flustered you. “C’mon, you know I’m just joking.” You rolled your eyes.

 

Tonight you were spending the night with him. He called and said his parents would be gone for a week and he wanted you to stay over. You were more than happy to, as he’d more than likely call you at three in the morning to just chat your ear off or go on a walk around the neighborhood. He had always said you made him more comfortable.

 

You fetched the orange pill bottle and held them out to him. His steely eyes met yours for a moment, then looked down to the bottle in your hands.

“These don’t even work.”

 

“You never take them, so how would you know?” You unscrewed the cap and held two capsules in your perfectly manicured fingers. “Please, Josh.”

 

He sighed, taking the capsules from your hands, his fingers lingering a bit too long. The way he looked at you sent chills up your spine. He stood from the couch, once dry swallowing the pills, and leaned his forehead against yours.

 

“So, what about you, Princess? You take your meds?”

 

_Shit_. You hadn’t. You took pill after pill every day for depression and anxiety, as well as the newest diagnosis of PTSD. Your frequent panic attacks would render you useless and crippled as memories of things not to be thought about began to surface in your mind.

 

The pain!

 

_Oh, God the pain!_

 

His hands around your throat, you couldn’t breathe, no one to call, no hope-

 

“Hey!” Josh waved his hands in front of your face. “You okay? You got all spacey on me.”

 

You nodded slowly as he took your frame into his arms.

 

“Hey, it’s okay. Let’s take your meds now, huh?”


	2. 6/27/12

You stared at yourself in the mirror, unsure whether or not to leave the bathroom. The bathing suit showed far too much leg and chest than you were comfortable with, you looked so silly. Everyone would _surely_ make fun of you if you walked out there like this.

 

It was settled. You were going home.

 

There were two quick raps at the door and a call of your name.

 

“Hey, you coming out anytime soon?” The voice asked.

 

“No, I’m going home…” You stuttered out to Josh, your best friend. His annual summer pool party, open to the whole school. Only this summer it would be his last. This was your senior year, everyone would be parting ways from here. Josh planned to travel a bit before he started college, Sam had already been accepted into a top notch university to study pediatrics, and Emily was going off to study economics and business, while the rest of the gang wasn’t really sure. You wanted to go to school for photography and a minor in art history.

 

“Why?” He asked concerned. “The ‘ole crimson wave show up?”

 

“No!” You exclaimed. “I just…I look stupid. I’ll get made fun of.”

 

There was a jiggling of the knob. “C’mon let me see.”

 

“Josh…” You groaned. “No, you cannot convince me otherwise.” He was your closest friend. He wouldn’t steer you wrong. Would he?

 

After a moment of deliberation, you crack the door open and pull Josh inside.

 

Josh looked you up and down once. Your bikini was black with a _deep_ cut and tassels hanging from the bottom. The bottoms were solid as well and felt too tight.

 

“I think you look fucking hot.” He said simply.

“I look like a whale, Josh!” You exclaimed as you turned back to the mirror, nearly crying.

 

Josh wrapped his arms around you from behind, smiling. “You look perfect.”

 

It had now occurred to you that Josh was naked from the waist up. His bare chest was flush against your back and _fuck_ did it do something to you. Josh was at the perfect intersection of lean and muscular, and that was exactly how you liked your guys. Not to mention he wasn’t bad looking at all.

 

 _No_! This is your _best friend_! You couldn’t think that way about him. It would ruin everything. He was the only one you could trust with your deep late night thoughts and ugly selfies.

 

You sighed, giving in. “Fine, but if anyone says anything-“

 

“They won’t.”

 

“I’ll cry.” You crossed your arms as Josh released you.

 

“If they make you cry, I’ll kick their ass.”

 

You laughed, hugging him quickly before the two of you left the bathroom together.

 

Mike looked over and tapped Chris. “Look, Josh finally took her to the bone zone! GO JOSH!” He yelled. Judging by the red plastic cup in his hand, he was drunk off his ass.

 

You hid behind Josh, feeling flustered. “Please explain this to them later when everyone is sober.”

 

“Of course, my dear.”

 

 

 

You had walked around, socializing a bit here and there, mostly just shadowing Josh. You had apologized so many times for being so annoying, and each time Josh would reassure you he liked your company and didn’t mind.

 

Josh leaned over and whispered something to the DJ and the music was cut. He climbed on top of a nearby party table and a hush fell over the seventy something drunk teenagers that were outside, some began to pile out onto the patio when they saw Josh about to address the guests. 

 

“Thank you guys so much for coming out here today!” A cheer came from everyone and the noise made your ears ring. “Man, I wasn’t sure if I was gonna throw a party this year, because as many of you know my sisters Beth and Hannah have…passed.” There were a few whispers among the crowd as Josh took a deep breath. “My sisters,” His voice broke. “Loved these parties. They loved getting together and seeing everyone from the school having fun, even if they didn’t know their names.” He smiled in reminiscence. “They were struck on March fifteenth by a drunk driver on their way to a party. They were loved by so many. I just wanted to take this moment, and send our love and respect to them in the afterlife. I want them to know we all love and care for them.” Josh grabbed a bottle of vodka from the table he was standing on “So, let’s party in their honor, huh?” They crowd went into an uproar.

 

Josh stepped down from the table and hurriedly ran back inside and up some stairs.

 

“Josh?” You whispered his name and ran after him. “Hey!” You grabbed his hand as he entered a bedroom, slamming the door behind you two.

 

There were tears in his eyes when he turned to face you. “It’s all my fault. I killed them.” He cried as you took him into your arms.

 

“No it’s not.” You led him to the bed and sat down, gently rocking him as his tears ran down your shoulder.


	3. 9/22/14

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> !!TRIGGER WARNING!!  
>  While, this isn't exactly detailing the event in ultra HD morbid details, there is mention of a rape that happened in past events. It's sort of like a Law & Order SVU trial. If this triggers you, please skip it, as you can probably read the rest of the story without knowing the details of this chapter. I promise this will be one of the few chapters that will be this dark.

It was the part of the trial that you had to testify. The stuffy grey suit they had you in was suffocating and everyone looking at you made you want to cry.

 

_“If you testify, this will give us a much better chance of putting him away. Do you think you’re up for it?”_

Josh’s family had hired the best of the best lawyers for you. They wanted him to rot in jail as much as you did. Although, you knew how cases like this tended to play out.

 

Tears stung your eyes as they called you to the witness stand.

 

“So, on the night of March fifteenth, 2012, where were you?” Your lawyer asked.

 

“I was out at a party with friends. I was invited, so I showed up.”

 

“Can you tell us what happened that night?” Your stomach turned. They had coached you on what to say, but the thought was still sickening.

 

“I…um…” You sniff as a tear rolls down your cheek. “I got there and it was like any other regular high school party. Music, a lot of people, drinks. My friends were leaving, but I didn’t have a ride, so I was going to ride home with this girl who lives across the street from me. I was waiting in the bathroom for her to be ready to go, when the defendant, Mr. Huntington walked into the bathroom. He apologized at first and I said it was fine and I left. After that, he started to follow me. I was looking for the girl and I couldn’t find her. Mr. Huntington kept trying to speak to me, and I told him I wasn’t interested. I figured he’d lay off after that but…but…” It became hard to breathe. The world became blurry with tears. You were on the verge of a panic attack.

 

You could almost hear Josh’s warm and comforting voice. You could almost feel his embrace coaxing you down from the ledge. You took a deep breath and looked into your lawyer’s eyes.

 

“What happened then?” She asked.

 

“I was looking for the girl who was supposed to be taking me home, so I was wandering room to room and asking around for her. Then, I felt hands on my back. They…they pushed me inside a room. The master bedroom. I turned around and it was him.”

 

“Let the record show that by ‘him’ my client means Mr. Huntington.” You nodded as your lawyer clarified.

 

“Then he…” Here it came again, the ragged breathing, the nausea. “He held a hand over my mouth and said if I screamed he’d hurt me a lot more than he already was going to. I started crying and he yelled at me. He pulled down my underwear and…” You burst into tears when your eyes caught Josh’s hurt expression.

 

“It’s okay, that’s enough, sweetheart.” She put a hand on your shoulder. “So, our defendant, Mr. Huntington _raped_ this poor, defenseless young girl. Nothing further, your honor.”  Your lawyer made her way back to the bench as you shifted uncomfortably in your seat. The defense attorney, an elderly man with large circular glasses and silver hair approached the witness stand. He smiled coyly at you.

 

“So, you claim my client, Mr. Huntington, raped you. Well, did you at any point tell my client to _stop_.”

 

“What?” You asked astonished. How could he even ask such a stupid question?

 

“I can repeat the ques-“

 

“I didn’t particularly say stop but I was _crying_. He _threatened me_.”

 

“So, no?”

 

“No, but-“

 

“So, if you didn’t tell him to stop, how was my client supposed to know you were uncomfortable. After all, you had seduced him.”

 

“Excuse me?” You raise an eyebrow. This was preposterous! You had only wanted to go home. You hadn’t said more than six words to him.

 

“The way my client tells the story, is that you had been partaking in some alcohol, that you yourself said was being supplied at the party, and you asked him to follow you up to the room that this _so called rape_ transpired in.”

 

So called? It happened! You suffered from crippling panic attacks and depression and they’re talking like you had made everything up. The last two years of waking up screaming in the middle of the night was made up.

 

“I wasn’t drinking.”

 

“So you weren’t drinking, but you did ask him to follow you?”

 

“No!”

 

“No to what?”

 

“I didn’t ask him to follow me and I was not drinking.”

 

“Then why did no one report the rape for more than a week?”

 

“Because I was dealing with the death of a friend on top of all this. I-I wanted to say something, but-”

 

“But, what? But, you were lying about the whole thing? But you made it up?”

 

“No!” You exclaimed as you began to cry again. God, you wanted nothing more than for this to be over.

 

“Objection! Badgering the witness.” Your lawyer stood and said.

 

“Sustained. Move on, Mr. Charleston.” The judge said.

 

“Is it true that you were still a virgin when my client took you?”

 

You sobbed harder. “W-what?”

 

“Objection! Relevance?”

 

“Does this have a point, Mr. Charleston?”

 

The defense attorney nodded, and looked back to you. “You were desperate to ‘punch the v-card’, as the kids would say. If the jury would, look to Mr. Huntington. He’s not an unattractive individual. He’s captain of the football team, I could see how, to a young high school girl like yourself, he’d be something well sought after.”

 

“Your point, Mr. Charleston.”

 

“You two had your time together, but you got angry when he said he couldn’t be with you. So, you cried rape to make him feel as bad as you did. To bring him down from his reign of popularity. You envied him.”

 

“No, I-”

 

“Leave her alone!” Josh yelled from the viewing section of the court. “You all are fucking insane to believe anything that man says, she’s _in tears_ up there!”

 

The judge swung her gavel down once, twice, three times. “Order!” She yelled. “Get that young man out of here!” The bailiff ran for Josh and grabbed him and practically _dragged_ him out of the courtroom.

 

“Nothing further, your honor.” 

 

You wanted nothing more than to run off that stand. To run all the way home and cry and hide from the world. Nobody believed you. You didn’t even believe you anymore. Your skin prickled as you made your way back to your seat next to your attorney and held your face in your hands.


	4. 2/11/14

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> okey doke so now that that dreary chapter over, here's something a bit more happy, i suppose.

“Josh!” You whispered, nudging him out of his sleep.

 

He groaned, peaking one green eye at you.

 

You were visiting Washington Mountain with the gang for the week. It was the first time not having the twins there, and there was an odd uneasiness about it. There were so many pictures strewn around of the girls and every time Josh looked at one he’d nearly break down.

 

“Can I hang out in here, with you?” You whisper and almost immediately Josh scoots to one side of the bed and allows you to lay down.

 

“What’s wrong?” He asked.

 

“Nothing. Just feeling uneasy.” After a long silence you decided to keep speaking. “I was worried about you.”

 

“Why?” He asked, clearly more awake. He turned to face you and you could see his features illuminated by the moonlight. If only you could capture him right now in this moment.

 

“You seemed spacey all night, and I totally understand, but I want you to know I’m here for you. If you need to talk, I-“

 

He sighed. “I know.” He turned to lay on his back and looked up at the ceiling. “I just…”

 

“I know I won’t understand what you’re going through. I just want you to trust me with your feelings and know that I care about you more than any-“

 

He was kissing you. He was kissing you hard. Your mind was fuzzy and Josh was the only thing filling your thoughts. His tongue invaded your mouth and his hand began to slide southward.

 

No.

 

_No!_

 

You broke the kiss scooting to the far side of the bed. Your eyes were wide and you could only think about him. How hard he grabbed you and threw you down. The bruises on your shoulders that were there for weeks as a grim reminder.

 

“I’m sorry.”

 

“Fuck!” Josh exclaimed sitting up. “I’m so sorry. I didn’t know this would set you off, I’m so, so sorry.” He apologized profusely. That’s when you saw the tears in his eyes. “Fuck, I can’t do anything right.” He held his head in his hands, trying to hide the tears. “I’m sorry. I didn’t mean it.”

 

“Don’t cry.” You admit, you were hesitant to approach him so you stood your ground a few feet away.

 

“I just…I love you _so fucking much_. I can’t breathe when I’m with you. You just…you get me and I…I don’t know.”

 

Your heart skipped a beat. Did he really mean that? This wasn’t a dream? A really, _really_ teasing dream.

 

“Oh my fuck, please say something.”  Josh cried.

 

“I love you, too.”

 

 

 

You spent the entire night talking to Josh about nothing. He let you snap a few photos of him in the moonlight and you fell asleep, albeit on opposite sides of the bed.

 

You woke to the smell of pancakes and Josh not at your side.

 

 _Sam must be up_ , you thought and trudged downstairs. Everyone was gathered around a table eating fluffy looking pancakes. Everyone looked to you as you walked into the room. You gave a polite smile and quiet _good morning_ as you made your way to the kitchen counter to grab a plate from an overhead cupboard and cutlery. You took a few pancakes from the stack in the skillet and sat down.

 

You happily chatted with everyone that morning, but it became evident that Josh hadn’t told the gang that you two were dating.

 

Well, you weren’t _technically_ dating, but still you expected some degree of public affection.

 

But, there wasn’t any.

 

And there wasn’t any the whole rest of the trip.

 

Eventually, you had forgotten the whole night even happened.

**Author's Note:**

> So, if you can't tell by the name of this chapter this story will detail days together with Josh. They will not all necessarily be in order, as I plan to jump around the months a bit.


End file.
